Best birthday-party-not-actually-on-my-birthday evar!
Nina brought a sticker for my computer and a card that made me cry. Holly made tex-mex tacos. Loreen made the best cupcakes ever and mine had a candle in it.
They sang three different happy birthday songs to me, including (most appropriately):
May the candles on your cake
Burn like cities in your wake.
Dancing didn’t quite manifest, but we had music and food & wine and five conversations spread through three rooms. The kids played upstairs and occasionally came tearing through the house. We played games and talked and laughed and laughed and laughed.
Going to bed tired and happy.
Holy crap, i have less than six days till i fly to Europe!
Don’t want to carry any extra weight, so i’d better get rid of all these tabs.
I love this Marco Fusinato project called, “Music Is What Numbers Feel Like.”
I’ve been researching logo trends for my day job. Some fun stuff here.
I’m also lately fascinated by Smashing Magazine, which is full of cool design tips.
Since i’m bouncing around the world, and have no money, i’ve been spending a lot of time on the Couchsurfer’s Site. Particularly making sure i do it in a safe fashion.
While i’m in London, i’m really hoping to visit the T-Party writing group.
I keep forgetting that i plan to read this article on How To Make America More Innovative.
I want to read this economics book, “Whoops!: Why Everyone Owes Everyone and No One Can Pay.”
Just in case folks who knew danele are reading this. My old friend Devon posted videos of danele’s memorial service.
I’m curious about developing a few television shows. These two articles cover one’s way too formulaic for my taste, but still have interesting information.
My writing has been on hiatus while J and i work through our separation stuff and i get ready for Europe, but i plan to get back on track querying agents and submitting stories in a week or so.
Ok, going to bed …
I really am.
My friend Leslie lent me a car so i could run errands before i go. Holly knew J and i were sad, so she got us each a massage. Neil offered me a house to stay in while i’m in Scotland. My ex is throwing me a birthday party. Three people have offered me backpacks and tons of people have given me suggestions and advice.
Sometimes i let myself forget how many people care, how lucky i am to have all these folks in my life.
But not today; i’m letting myself feel blessed. Love you all.
It’s so true! I’m flying to the UK in March and heading vaguely east starting in April.
So, friends, family and teh rest of the internets, where should i go? What should i do? I’m looking for advice, stories, warnings, whatever. Starting in April i have an open schedule and nearly unlimited time (although very little money.)
Do you live in Europe? Want to recommend a city? Looking for a visit? Want to put me up? Have any friends out there? Let me know!
I haven’t taken a vacation in ten years. Help!
J and I have known for awhile but it took us a long time to tell our friends, even longer to tell our families. But at this point I think most people know we’re splitting up.
For a divorce, it’s going fantastically well. We don’t feel bitter or angry. We still love each other. We still like each other. I don’t think either of us did anything wrong. My friend Neil blogged (near the bottom) that he and his ex-wife work much better as friends and neighbors than as a married couple. I think something like that is true for us too. There’s so much we love and appreciate about each other, but there’s a whole subset of our relationship that isn’t making us happy. More importantly, we’ve been worried that we’re growing less when we’re together than when we’re apart. It’s more complicated than that, but that’s the basics.
And that’s sort of the crux of it. We’ve been married almost four years. The core of our vows was to support each other to grow, even if it meant not being together. So, it’s been good, and sad, and confusing … and in the end we’re just doing the best we can and trying our best to be good to each other.
In three days we’re doing a divorce ceremony. Part of that will be affirming that we’re not completely leaving each others’ lives and that neither of us can predict the future. After the ceremony is done we’re going to have a potluck and wake.
We’re been doing pretty well slogging through packing up and splitting our stuff, figuring out money and making sure both of us will be okay after I go. We’ve decided not to talk for six months while we get used to life as whatever we are after we’re not married.
In less than a month i’m off to Europe to find adventure (and do a bunch of writing). I’m scared, and sad, and excited and numb all at once. I really appreciate all the support my friends have given me …
… and if you’re reading this and you want to reach out to one or both of us, we would love that.
So that’s it. Hope this clears up all the vague European references.
Love to you all,